I have been talking to a lot of young adults looking for internships and first jobs. The only way to get a job is by networking. Sorry, but that’s the truth for 99% of new-to-work folks.
It’s just too easy to push a button on LinkedIn and submit 100 applications in an hour. Unless your resume is a perfect match, you won’t get a second look.
Your Network Is a “Forever Transaction”
Here’s the thing. Networking is best done when you don’t need something. Build a strong, vibrant network in advance, and it’s there when you do need it — to move to a new city, start a company, or land your next job. Think of your network as a “forever transaction”. It’s a commitment between you and your people you respect to support each other when you can.
The data backs this up. Researchers studying entrepreneurs found that 78% of entrepreneurs say networking is vital to their startup’s success. People who relocate and rebuild a social network show measurably lower cardiovascular stress than those who stay isolated. And employees hired through a personal connection stay roughly 70% longer than those hired off a job board. Networking isn’t a soft skill. It’s infrastructure.
There’s a difference between building a network and using it, though the two often happen at once. (“I need a job, so I guess I better start building my network!”) That’s backwards. The network should already be there when the need shows up.
Start With the Network You Already Have
To build and strengthen your network (something all of us should do continuously) start by mapping who’s in it today, one slice of your life at a time. Hometown friends and their parents. The people at the coffee shop where you worked in high school. College friends, faculty, staff. People from internships and past jobs. People from extracurriculars. Most of us have more network than we think. We’ve just never taken inventory.
Start with your friendlies — the people you’re most comfortable with. “Hey, do you know anyone in Austin in the startup world who’d talk with me? I’m thinking of moving there to start a company.” Friendlies aren’t always best-positioned to help. They’re just the most likely to try.
As you get clearer on what you need, move to looser ties: people you know less well, friends of friends, the edges of your network. You can be more buttoned-up with them, more focused on what you’re trying to learn or accomplish.
Mark Granovetter’s landmark study on job changers found that most people landed their new role through a contact they saw only occasionally or rarely — not their closest ties. A 2022 MIT study of 20 million LinkedIn users confirmed it at scale: the strongest connections were the least useful for finding a new job. Your best source for something new is likely someone with maybe ten mutual connections, close enough to trust you, distant enough to hand you information your inner circle doesn’t have.
Then Expand to Weaker Connections
If your circle of friends, colleagues, and classmates is small, expand it by targeting people who share something with you — anything that makes them likely to take your call.
I recently advised a young man who’d been a firefighter and was now in law school part-time while working. Good grades, not great. Big firms saw a second-tier school and passed. So I pointed him toward lawyers at his target firms who’d come up through public service, the military, or union work — people wired to recognize what his path actually said about him. That’s how you build relationships with strangers: find the point of resonance first.
My own son was a D1 athlete. When he was job hunting, he sought out people at target companies in his target city who’d also played college sports and asked for informational interviews. They understood exactly what that level of commitment costs. They talked to him. They helped.
Especially early in your career, don’t hold back because you’re not sure what you bring to the table.
First: helping a hardworking, talented person is its own reward. That’s implicitly what you’re offering. Just don’t forget to circle back to everyone who’s helped you — keep them posted, not just when you need something again.
Second: you’ll often find ways to help that have nothing to do with careers. Setting up an AI agent. Introducing someone to a pet sitter. Reciprocity rarely runs through the same channel it came in on.
If the balance ever feels off, find someone to mentor. There’s always someone a step behind you who needs a leg up. You can be that person.
A complete network has three legs: mentors and referral sources above you, peers beside you who compare notes, and people below you whom you mentor.
You need all of them. So start building today, before you need it.