Your ability to handle rejection says more about you than success ever will.

That’s not just true in sales. It’s true in your career and in your life.

Let’s look at the numbers:

• 40% of Americans have been laid off or terminated at least once. 4

• The average job seeker goes through 27 interviewsbefore landing a role.

• About 90% of startups fail.

Here are a few of my own failures: I was rejected from most of the internships I applied for (You’re an English major–how could you possibly work in finance/tech/real estate). I was laid off while I was on maternity leave with my second child. I was rejected by all but one of the book agents I reached out to. No one wanted to publish The Membership Economy except McGraw-Hill.

I could go on. If you’ve felt rejected lately, you’re not alone—and you’re not broken.

What separates those who get stuck from those who grow is what they do next.

Here are 4 ways to embrace and grow from rejection:

1/ Seek to understand

Not all rejection is preventable. But some hold lessons. Ask: Was it something I could control or just “one of those things”?

2/ Channel your inner Ted Lasso

Be a goldfish. Learn what you can. Then let it go. Most people get rejected from jobs, book deals, and relationships, at least some of the time. Sometimes it’s just a numbers game. When my husband started working in banking, he was told to schedule 200 meetings with prospects–many didn’t lead to client relationships, but some did, and the aggressive forward motion helped him hit his numbers.

3/ Recall your wins

It takes 5 positive moments to counter 1 negative. Now’s the time to focus on what you’ve done well—and practice gratitude. No one wanted to publish my book, but when I did finally get it published, thousands of people bought copies. I try to think of all the people I’ve helped and the positive impact i’ve made through my writing, particularly in the face of doubt or failure.

4/ Pay it forward

Help someone earlier on the path. Coach, mentor, or encourage them. You’ll feel better and help them go further, faster. I always block time to mentor 1-3 consultants just getting started. Helping them establish and scale their businesses feels good, and reminds me that I have a lot to offer.

Rejection doesn’t define you—your response does.

It can spark self-reflection, humility, and clarity.

The question isn’t whether you’ll get rejected; you will. We all will. It’s what you’ll do next.